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Kwinana United v Maddington


Kwinana v Maddington

“Lads, where the fuck is the place?”

“I’m at a dead end!”

“There’s no Serbians here?”

Mass confusion rained down on the lads as they struggled to find the ground for today’s blockbuster game against Maddington White City (no Jags here…). Eventually, everyone, including myself, managed to get to the Nicola Tesla Reserve although I’m an Edison fan myself.

There were a few changes to the reserves team, most notably being Captain Neil Evans who spent most of the first half counting sheep. The lads dominated the game, with young Dale Viney banging in 4 goals with the help of the returning Kris Donnell who hasn’t shown that much fancy footwork since he moon-stomped the child at Subiaco. The score ended at 6-1 with Kris getting one and Collins finishing off a great team goal. Some notable debuts for Callum, who ran the midfield and Sheldon, who was so eager to play left his wallet on the train. Someone should ask Jimmy if any of his cousins happened to see it.

Onto the first team now, the lads were desperate for a win having drawn the last two games in the league. The game got off to a great start, as the Brazilian Glen Smith, Lucas Mello, spanked the ball like a red headed step child straight past the keeper putting Kwinana one up early. Maddington managed to equalise when Joe Cooked was caught napping and their forward slotted home an easy finish. Lucas showed some Samba flare as he grabbed a second goal, and set Big Lee Bates up with an inch perfect through ball. The defence led by the returning Leith Hinds looked a few bricks short of being a wall as Maddington kept finding ways to score.

As the second half got under way, Luke Rennie was subbed on, only to be stomped on by the Maddington’s own Mr Potato Head. Rennie, however, claims he was bricked outside the Rocky Hotel even though we all saw what happened… With that injury, he officially makes the Sticky Bandits complete.

Eventually, Maddington found themselves 4-3 up with only 10 minutes to go – big Kris channelled his inner Allerdyce by yelling to the lads “GO ROUTE ONE”. It seemed to work as Kwinana won the game with a last minute header by Lee Bates that would have made Andy Carroll proud. The game ended with a 5-4 win for the lads, maintaining an undefeated season so far.

Onwards and upwards as we go on to face Whitford City next week!

Stay Classy, San Diego.